Downham Online Discussion

Hallo Mike,

Bournemouth eh?  You must have itchy feet!

I have to say I felt such a pang of sadness to see that Downham online will soon be a thing of the past.  I cannot begin to describe how excited I was when I first found it and how much pleasure it gave me to find old friends and make new ones and to share in nostalgia for the Downham of my early life.  I do thank you very sincerely for your work in keeping the site going and for so long.  I don't suppose any of us really expressed the appreciation we felt. 

I am not a fan of Facebook. I registered only to be able to keep in touch with the children of a dear friend of mine who passed away many years ago but I never put anything on there and feel a lot of bad stuff comes up on it.

Anyway, I do wish you and your family a wonderful 2020.  May you all keep happy, healthy and safe in what seems like a fraught world at times. 

Thanks again, Mike, thank you.

Brenda

Too late to wish everyone Merry Christmas but I hope you all had a good one.  I do wish you all a happy, healthy and safe 2019.



Brenda

I found things very quite on the site, so I been on a Catford Lewisham Site, for a while. What with our internet system changing, and Windows 10 its been a challenge, good to see some of the long time members, I will use again


Good to see you back again, Hutch.  I hope all is going well with you and yours.

Brenda

It's good to see the boss's name come up, Mike!  Obviously everything is still going okay for you in New York - pleased to hear it.
Very different from life on Downham, I'm sure.

Look forward to seeing something from the new members soon.

Bren

Very interesting indeed, Joanie.   My mother worked in Robertson's Jam Factory for a while.  I think - but may be wrong - it was in the early to mid-60s.  How absolutely wonderful that so many people were generous enough to let you into the old places.  I imagine that revisiting your past places were very emotional occasions.   My husband, two kids and I came out to Australia in 1974 and have never returned.  I think it is too late now as so much has changed.   The house in Durham Hill (opposite the school where my mother was a cleaner for many years when I was a child) where I was brought up was demolished several years ago due to its condition.  When I found that out, I was very, very sad and it was and always will 'home'.  Having said that, I love my life here in rural Victoria where we have a smallholding of 36acres, a few sheep and cows and far too many venomous snakes!  I find it interesting that all the old Downhamites, most of whose families struggled to make ends meet, nevertheless retain such a very real affection for the estate.
So glad your son came through the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.  I don't doubt that would have been an ordeal for you too! 

Bren

You've had an interesting life, Tony.   Interestingly, my father was a postman for many years and then sat exams to join the Civil Service.  He got a clerical job in the War Office after that.  He died in 1963 after a massive stroke suffered as he got ready for work, he was 53yrs old.  Yes, many regrets about not getting to know more about him but he was a kind man and had a good brain but, being brought up in the Bermondsey slums at the beginning of the 20th century, he never had the chance to reach his potential.    He joined the Army aged 17 and stayed in for 11 years before going back to Civvy Street.

Good to hear from you, Tony.  What extraordinary coincidences you share with your neighbour!  You wouldn't believe it unless you experienced it, would you?  I did meet a couple in a shop in Ararat (Victoria) and said, on hearing their accent, "I bet I know where you come from," meaning London, of course.  It turned out they were from Shortlands and knew Downham well, especially the Downham Baths.  However, they didn't seem at all interested in having more than a desultory conversation.  I also met a man who was from Grove Park but he, too, wasn't interesting in reminiscing with me.

I was born in 1943.  My father, being 30ish, was called up in the second wave (he'd been a regular soldier from many years previously) and I should know what year it was but don't.  I don't know how often he might have come home on leave but according to my mother, he came home from France on leave and just avoided the Dunkirk debacle.  My uncle was captured there and spent the rest of the war as a POW.  So many tales to tell but nobody really spoke much about it and I was too young to have all the questions I now do. 

Did you and your father manage to develop a good relationship eventually despite being virtual strangers to each other?  I had a friend who came home to a new daughter but could never really 'take' to her somehow.  Rather sad and I think it was not an isolated case.

You are correct, in my opinion, about all the suicides and depression that go on now.  But I think the challenges in modern day life are different to those of our generation and certainly of the generation that got through the war and simply had to get going.  I think, also, that many marriages that might have otherwise succeeded, failed because of the war and separations.  If my own parents were happy when they first married, they certainly weren't after the war.

Bren 

Our old house in Durham Hill was demolished many years ago as the foundations were collapsing.  It was always on the shift even when we moved there in 1948.  I was very sad to hear it had gone and then, of course, so has the old library (I loved that place even as a young child) and swimming baths.
Pendragon School as I knew it is no more and I would have liked to have seen all these places again..

 And old friends have gone as have all the aunts and uncles and some of the cousins.  I think I've left it too late to visit now.  Actually, I often do visit 'home' in my dreams and as I am walking around looking for places and telling people I used to live there but 'I belong in Australia' and I wake up knowing I am in the right place.

As you say, Smiffy, change is inevitable and it's daft to think anything can stay the same for ever.

Bren