Author Topic: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!  (Read 6036 times)

Pauline

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Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« on: September 26, 2008, 09:13:53 AM »
Recently, A woman was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my flower tubs.
As I turn on the hose I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
I go to get the car keys from the porch and then notice mail on the porch table.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the bin under the table, and notice that the bin is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the rubbish first.
 But then I think, I can run down to the post-box when I take out the rubbish, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my cheque book off the table, and see that there is only 1 cheque left.
My extra cheques are in the computer desk, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.     
I'm going to look for my cheques, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.   
The Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the fridge to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the window ledge catches my eye - they need water.
I put the Coke on the window ledge and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my computer desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.
I set the glasses back down on the window ledge, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone has left it on 
the kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for  the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I  decide to put it back in the living room where it belongs,  but first I'll water the flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers, but some spills on the floor.   
So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
 -The tubs aren't watered;
 -The car isn't washed;
 -The bills aren't paid;
 -There is a warm can of Coke sitting on the window ledge
 -The flowers don't have enough water;
 -There is still only 1 cheque in my cheque book;
 -I can't find the remote;
 -I can't find my glasses;
 -I have absolutely NO idea what I did with the car keys.  Then, when I try to work out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I'm really tired.
I realise this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail
Do me a favour. Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember who the hell I've sent it to.

Born 1944 in Geraint Road.  Launcelot and Churchdown Schools.  Moved to Western Australia in 1988.
Two children, 6 grandchildren, 3 dogs, hundreds of snakes, spiders and lizards.

JSmith

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #1 on: September 27, 2008, 02:44:22 AM »
I had a really good chuckle at that Pauline, exactly the type of thing that I would do,  some ball bearings fell out of my head through my ears, so I just get used to being a senior and laugh it all off. :)
Born 1945 Churchdown road.

     You can take the Boy out of Downham,but you cant take Downham out of the Boy.

Brenda

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #2 on: September 27, 2008, 11:14:24 AM »
I am not even going to embarrass myself by telling you some of the daft things I've been doing lately!

Bren

Bel

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #3 on: September 27, 2008, 11:34:44 PM »
well.......I went into the paper shop to pay the weekly paper bill, and gave the address that I used to live at five years ago.!  Reminds me of the time I took an old lady home from the hospital for a visit to her home to arrange for some external rails to be fitted.  She gave me her address (which I should have checked)  and when I got there and tried her key in the lock it wouldn't work so I knocked on the door which was opened by a very attractive young man with a very scanty bath towell around him (I had apparently got him out of the bath as he thought somebody was trying to break in).  Yes you have guessed right, she used to live there before she got married twenty odd years ago,  and there was I standing on the step with this old lady telling him that I had bought her home for him to took after.   He was not impressed..    Belx         

JSmith

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #4 on: September 28, 2008, 10:13:46 PM »
Quote from Bell.......I went into the paper shop to pay the weekly paper bill.



That reminds me of the Tommy Cooper joke.

I went to the paper shop the other day, and it had blown away. :) ;D
Ok one more.
I went to the corner shop and bought some corners. :) ;)
« Last Edit: September 28, 2008, 10:17:30 PM by JSmith »
Born 1945 Churchdown road.

     You can take the Boy out of Downham,but you cant take Downham out of the Boy.

christine

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2008, 10:44:18 AM »
Nice one Pauline - now I feel normal again - it was Pauline who started this wasn't it?
I seem to be having a problem with technology these days.  I can do all the computer things - you know surfing the web and dealing with emails but I recently bought a new Fiat 500 - fabulous little car and really love it.  Only thing is it has a computer which drives me mad.  Everything has been set up by my son-in-law, including something called 'Blue&Me' which means my mobile phone connects to the computer, the radio switches itself off, and a voice (usually the daughter) is shouting at me from a microphone above the rear view mirror.  I have sort of got used to it but haven't dared to make a call out because it is activated either by the way names are recorded on my mobile or by numbers - none of which, of course, I can remember!  It also has a menu which husband fiddled with and b.............d up so I ended up with daylight lights on permanently and it took me 2 days to sort out (only to read in the newspaper that daylight lights might become EU law - so will have to get husband in the car again). All this and not to mention all the controls on my steering wheel and an Ipod dock.   So who out there has managed to work out how to download onto Ipods or are they MP3s or are they the same?
Anyway for all you girls - you will be pleased to know that I have mastered one thing at my daughter's house - how to plug in a sterilising unit and sterilise baby bottles - so what happened to Milton (or was that for nappies?).  I also got to see a DVD of the 1985 Live Aid concert at the kids house (a shortened version) - son-in-law kept asking me who the people were and for the life of me could only remember those that are still alive now or who have retired and keep coming back....

Oh well - now what was I going to do next.....

Bel

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #6 on: October 30, 2008, 05:03:47 PM »
oh dear,  I have finally lost the plot.  On washing up the other day, the handle of a saucepan snapped in two . As it was a large one, and one that is rarely used I thought I would take it back to the shop and complain.  This I did and was told there were no simiiar ones left (I had no receipt and couldnt remember how long I had had it) but they would keep  the saucepan and wait until the buyer came in the next day as he would definitely know and then would phone me.  However a few days later I had a "flash back" and realized that I had bought the saucepan from another shop which had closed down!!!!  never did receive the phone call but the men in white coats are on their way.  Bel

JSmith

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #7 on: October 31, 2008, 01:45:50 AM »
It's confessing time is it, OK. I am with my Son in the grocery store looking at different light bulbs trying to find the one I need, so as to get a better look I handed my Son some light bulbs while I could find the ones I wanted, I finally find some and put them in the cart, then I turned to my Son saw the light bulbs in His hand and I said to Him "What do you want those light bulbs for" which He replied well you gave them to me. We laughed all the way Home. :( It comes with the package.
« Last Edit: October 31, 2008, 01:47:56 AM by JSmith »
Born 1945 Churchdown road.

     You can take the Boy out of Downham,but you cant take Downham out of the Boy.

Pauline

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #8 on: October 31, 2008, 06:24:28 AM »
oh dear,  I have finally lost the plot.  On washing up the other day, the handle of a saucepan snapped in two . As it was a large one, and one that is rarely used I thought I would take it back to the shop and complain.  This I did and was told there were no simiiar ones left (I had no receipt and couldnt remember how long I had had it) but they would keep  the saucepan and wait until the buyer came in the next day as he would definitely know and then would phone me.  However a few days later I had a "flash back" and realized that I had bought the saucepan from another shop which had closed down!!!!  never did receive the phone call but the men in white coats are on their way.  Bel
OK - some years back we went with some friends to Singapore and Hong Kong.  In Singapore it was quite warm, but in Hong Kong it was cooler, so I went to my suit case to get my black leather shoes.  Not there.  We had moved rooms, so I thought they may have got left in the previous room.  The hotel staff searched to no avail.  Oh Well I thought - that's that I could have left them in Singapore. The hotel security came, and asked me questions, and asked if I thought that the staff had taken them, to which I replied, "No, I could have left them in Singapore".  Never thought any more of it until I got home, and there they were on my bed - I hadn't packed them.  Of course I quickly let the hotel know what an idiot I was, we had a good laugh, and they were pleased it wasn't one of their staff, and pleased I hadn't accused them.  BUT my dear Pete brings it up from time to time!
Born 1944 in Geraint Road.  Launcelot and Churchdown Schools.  Moved to Western Australia in 1988.
Two children, 6 grandchildren, 3 dogs, hundreds of snakes, spiders and lizards.

Brenda

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #9 on: November 02, 2008, 11:41:20 PM »
Have I ever told about the time a friend and I got on the wrong boat? And we were only 20years old at the time.  Must have been when the downhil slide started!
Bren

JSmith

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #10 on: November 03, 2008, 01:17:55 AM »
Have I ever told about the time a friend and I got on the wrong boat? And we were only 20years old at the time.  Must have been when the downhill slide started!
Bren

Well look at it this way Bren you have some years of preparation. :) :)
Born 1945 Churchdown road.

     You can take the Boy out of Downham,but you cant take Downham out of the Boy.

Pauline

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Re: Old Age - how it creeps up - This is me!!!
« Reply #11 on: November 04, 2008, 01:16:41 AM »
Have I ever told about the time a friend and I got on the wrong boat? And we were only 20years old at the time.  Must have been when the downhil slide started!
Bren

A friend of mine drove into Perth city, forgot about the car, and got the bus home.  It was only when her husband got home, and wanted to use the car that she realised what she had done.

I also had a friend who parked her car in the carpark at Sittingbourne station, collected it again on one Friday evening, put it in the garage, and used her husbands car over the weekend.  It was only on Sunday evening when the Police came round, that she realised she had taken someone elses identical car - the fact that the key fitted had everyone puzzeld, and they both must have had really boring cars, obvioulsy no broken toys, McDonald wrappers, toy packaging, spare boys T-shirts and shorts.  I'm sure i would know immediately if I got in the wrong car, especially after my grandchildren had vacated it.
Born 1944 in Geraint Road.  Launcelot and Churchdown Schools.  Moved to Western Australia in 1988.
Two children, 6 grandchildren, 3 dogs, hundreds of snakes, spiders and lizards.